Well, this is awkward. I didn't really mean to do a Valentine's Day article. But here I am writing one. So this is raw writing. Stream of consciousness. No editing. At all.
On Valentine's Day
Okay, so Valentine's Day is a really strange holiday. Like there's always the "hate" by single people. And there's the pressure to do something special. And, if you get to know me, I hate pressure to do any act of kindness. I don't like forced gift giving during Christmas, for example. I just believe that if you're going to do something nice, it should be from the kindness of your heart. Not because of the social pressure to do something.
Also, what do single people even do during Valentine's Day? It's actually really easy. You celebrate love in all its real forms. Why do I say "real" forms, not just all forms of love?
There are supposedly seven types of "love."
So let's apply this to Valentine's Day. You're celebrating a family, friendly, and romantic type of love. For singles, they are celebrating mainly family and friendly love. So we show love for our family and friends on Valentine's Day. If you think about it, it's actually really great.
On Modern Romance
Recently, on the KingdomPen forum, I encountered a topic about love triangles. It was basically a rant on how bad love triangles were nowadays. And when you're that much against love triangles. You're actually talking about modern romance in general.
So that made me wonder. What makes modern romance so bad? I mean, it's really just . . . bad. I really can't think of another word except bad.
I think that modern romance is bad because of the predilection for an eros/ludus type of love. It's the romantic type of love with a healthy (more like unhealthy) dose of lust. Because people are so occupied with this type of love, they reject what true love really is.
Wait a second, true love? What does that even mean? I mean, on that list above, what is true love? How can you say that there is only one type of love, and that one is real. Doesn't that throw all the other types of love out the window? Can you even categorize love?
Before this gets too confusing, let's just leave it at this. Modern romance is missing something, because it's too infatuated with lust. They mistake it for love. This mistake probably stems from the post-modern movement toward skepticism. Since we're not really sure of everything, we must decide everything for ourselves. So what we like is good. And doesn't lust feel good? It must be good, right? See what I did there?
On True Love
This is where I try to resolve my rabbit trail above. And whenever you try to resolve something, what do you do? Duh, turn to the Bible :P
Please turn your Bible to the love chapter, I Corinthians 13. All Christians know what it says:
1Cor 13:4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant
So love is selfless. True love is selfless. Or is it? I mean, the Greek word used is agape. So the love chapter is really only describing one type of love, right? So it's just giving us a definition of agape: selflessness.
This still doesn't resolve the issue. Unless . . . it does (that's paradoxical).
If true love is agape, then there's no categories in love. So what's all the other stuff? Let me think:
Out of all of these, two are feelings and three are bonds. The other one is just the fact that people don't want to die. And only one is true love.
Something interesting to note, is how much family plays into this. The three bonds usually occur in families. And the two feelings are only right for married couples to have. So this is all just to say, that what people mistake for types of love are just variations of bonds and feelings within the nuclear family.
Honestly, that could be the problem with modern romance. It tries to stay away from what eros and ludus are really going for: the family. People want a fling. Not a family. That's the problem with modern romance.
Now none of this is researched. So this is just me speaking. My opinionated self. But I actually believe this, crazily. There's only one type of true love. Agape love.
So on Valentine's Day, why don't you celebrate two things. True love. And family.